Therapy and shadow integration: Introduction / Needs addressed
In life we inevitably encounter difficulties, sometimes when interacting with other people or faced with certain events.
Therapy helps us understand why we get in trouble in these specific situations. Often our reaction to these situations is a consequence of how we developed as individuals, with all the experiences life offered to us. Some negative experiences have never been fundamentally solved or integrated, and as a consequence keep triggering certain reactions, sensibilities or negative emotions when confronted with specific situations or events.
This is a very unconscious mechanism that we are not aware of.
Also, there can be parts of ourselves that have been less developed in our life.
For instance, a woman with a strongly developed emotional side might not have fully developed her masculine and rational side. As a consequence she will unconsciously keep looking for a partner who embodies the qualities she has not developed herself.
On the other hand, a « giving » type person will keep looking for and be surrounded by « receiving » type people. A very ego driven person will need an audience and followers.
Becoming aware of these unconscious patterns that govern our life and that explain difficult situations proves to be very helpful in our personal evolution and how we deal in a more satisfying manner with events and significant others.
When we are not aware of these patterns or if we do not take corrective action, we continue to experience these situations repeatedly. Once we become conscious of them and of their mechanism, as a next step we work on changing and resolving these patterns.
Needless to say, as a result of this work the quality of our life and our relationships will be significantly improved.
We cannot move forward smoothly in life, as longs as these patterns keep getting in the way, creating resistance, strong emotions, suffering and even conflict or violence.
Another domain in therapy is addressing patterns such as perfectionism, being too nice putting others first and forgetting self, putting a lot of effort in everything we do, being too impulsive, being pretty much obsessed by control, or having difficulties letting go.
Also a lack of self-confidence or self-esteem can be successfully addressed through therapy, as can issues of dependency.